Parasite Clearing Week 1 EXPERIENCE LOG
Bright, centered, balanced. Raw. Empowered. Deep sleeping, deep breathing, and greater capacity for attention. Soft and steady focus. Stillness in the storms. Abrupt eruptions of tears, anger, sadness, sorrow, pain, and desperation for easing the suffering of this world, and that which I am connected to. Joyful elation & exaltation. Deep love of life, self, other, nature, God. Commitment to consistency in flexibility & structure. Noticing when “otherness” or separation comes up - search, innerstand, honor, release, integration. There is no enemy - and there is absolutely an enemy. Both at the same time. A lot of both at the same time. Yearning to express love outwardly towards all things, and now inwardly - almost equal. Desire to remind others of their perfection & beauty, their gifts. To exude compassion and also hold accountable. Watching more and more patterns, choosing to allow the sensation within it, move through it, and create something else from the composted materials of my shadow parts.
Reconciling the “past”. Random memories to process. Deep love and appreciation for all of my “past”, “present”, and “future” partners and relationships. Acknowledging the misalignments within and the pain I caused, forgive. Acknowledging the misalignments and the pain others have caused me, I forgive. Shedding, crying and dancing through the pain of the death of my father - noticing the fears of the impending “loss” of my mother. Celebrating my journey and all of the strange iterations of being I have tried on and danced through. I love you. Forgiveness of ignorance and insolence, yet I will not become or condone.
I see the technology to make others my enemy and I refuse to play into it. I feel the emotional pull to believe the lie, and I won’t.
Letting go of the belief that all of this is done solely “on my own”. Everything is me, and I am everything. Sending love to those in turmoil and suffering. Sending comfort to those being ripped apart. Nuclear Bomb imagery, huge resistance - it looks and feels unbearable to my heart. For they are me, I am them. I feel you, and I cry for you - and I conjure joy within, for me and for you. Raise it up - the suffering is too dense. I’m unable to turn it off, just increase the threshold and capacity to hold it.
Physically, slower in my eating - intention. Calm down the urgency. Pay attention to now. Body feels fluid, blockages highlighted. No fear - breathe and move them out. Hydration. Eat living foods, not dead. Body can no longer tolerate the consumption of dead light. Crying for the animals, and thanking them. Crying for the trees, thanking them. Crying for the dead and diseased dirt, thanking it. Crying for the poison in the air, thanking it. Crying for the poison in the water, thanking it. Guardians are working overtime.
No food cravings, except a very brief urge for soft pretzels which dissolved in minutes. No desire for sugar. Want to move all the time, and then lay down and relax. Sitting sucks. Rolling out the bottoms of my feet constantly. Touching the tension in my body and breathing it out. Visualizing the release of bondage. Peach-colored roses in my uterus. Breaking the chains of my brothers and sisters. No more slavery. Holding bleeding wounds. Emit peace during transitions. Crying for the children.
Scrubbed the inside and outside of my car, prayers of gratitude for her.
Weight is lifting, and I am weightlifting. Releasing waste and mindful of wastefulness - Spirit of conservation, show me how.
Misalignment feels more intense & I am able to modulate despite.
Peace is coming to all. It has to. This can’t continue like this.
Keep clearing.
This is only week one, I am stoked for what is to come.